In the deep lakes of dark Moravia is growing the spirit of naked Karp (Cyprinus carpio nuda). In the summer these innocent creatures are enjoying the weather of south Czech. They are witnesses of many love stories but they have no clue that next christmas they will be a part of huge massacare.
¨I remember when they planted me in the muddy lake, Kurva. It was a nice time. There was so many things to eat and see. Life was so easy. I saw czech people dancing, pissing and puking in my home. But anyway I thought humans are nice. My older brothers were telling that in the winter time there has been some mysterious disapperings. But I tought there were just rumours. When I was two kilo and half I faced the kidnapping my self. Me and my friend 3 kilos where swimming against polluted Pivo-current when they catched him. The last words from 3 kilo was ¨I always going to be naked?.
After the cleanings by humans I started to be restless. I could not enjoy my dark paradise anymore. The fear tooked over me. It was her fault. It was the the women, black pupik hair women. She was organising the end of our nakedness. I was forced to do something.
One night when the female was once again washing her under hair, I was taking the law in my own hands. I did not want to go to Prague to be in some salty soup. I did what I had to do. I swam to her soul thrue the door she was giving me. Now I am the owner of the Karp farm in the south of Czech. I am producing Karp filets for the city people.
In the christmas time Karps are taking over the streets of Prague. Every second family in the capital is buying Karp to their homes. As a filet, pieces, or alive. The tradition of eating fish at christmas is simple. Like muslims the christian people should not eat the red meat at the birthday of Jesus. The most common fish at Czech is Karp so here we go...............
The Karps are planted in the Karp farms. Farms can be wild lakes or big pools. Very far from norwigian fish producing. Some guys just growing the fat naked fish and drinking beer between.
When the Karps are facing they last journey to the Prague, they are collected with huge nets. Then they are putted in the big water tanks which are already at the trucks. Then the alcoholic driver is starting the car and heading to the cities.
Five days before christmas the show is starting. The Karps are lifted to the smaller barriers to the selling points. The Selling points can be everywhere where is possibility to change water to the naked Karps. The last days of the Karps are not comfortable. A lot of them are suffered by others weight and none of them knows when is time to be a filet or travel to somewhere. There is also organisations which are trying to save Karps. One web site is www.ohz.cz
The attitude of czech people is ok, when they are cooking Karps. They keep Karps as their friends. They are talking with them and just touching them gently. When they are eating them their still remember how did the fish looked and was it active, impulsive or just a wonderer. But know I will tell you what is the best in this Karp tradition.
Over half a million Karps are cooked in the christmas time in Prague. Many of them are boughted as a filet, but a most of them are dealed as alive. People are coming to the selling points with a plastic bags. Then they show with their fingers which one they want and salesman is catching the chosen one and put him to the plastic bag. And then the journey starts. The Karp is strong fish so it will not die in the way of czech home, bath. Some people are having Karps even in metro with H&M plastic bags but most of the fish are not travelling in public transportation.
When the Karps are arriving home, they are gently putted to the clean bath which is filled with cold water. First naked Karps are a bit confused but after while, they enjoy their last days. The reason that czech people are keeping the fish at the bath is once again simple. The Karp farms are located in the muddy lakes or the farms water is coming from the brown fountains. Karps are putted to the baths that the clean sweet water would kill the taste of mud.
People are keeping the Karps at home alive at least two days but I heard that real gurus are holding bath for a week. Are the gurus having baths with Karps, who knows. Human and fish. When the naked fish are waking up the last time around the hair conditioners is time to hear what they have to say. ¨I hope I taste good¨
Most common food what people are preparing of the naked Karps is fried filet or a amazing Karp soup.The recepie of the soup is about like this . Raw vegetable with all the stuff you can find from the fish. Liver and many other smelling inside stuff are inclued. Beat that, and just swollow.
The tradition of keeping fish at the bath is great. Should we also start this habit. In Finland we could keep the pike in bath for some days and French could fight with the flat fish. The world is open for new ways of living. ¨Catch and release¨.
